Concern #1: “50 Shades” Distorts Sexual Intimacy (while suggesting it deepens it)

IMG_0926If you need a “safe word” in your sex life, then you don’t have sexual intimacy. Safe words are used in forms of consensual and abusive sex to cry “uncle” with one’s partner. The suggestion behind “50 Shades” is that to go this far with each other is the deepest form of a sexual relationship. The idea that intimacy between two people who love each other needs some sort of escape from what the other is doing perverts the very concept of intimacy itself.

Sex between a man and a woman should get safer emotionally, personally, and physically over time as intimacy and trust grow. True, pleasurable, meaningful, sexual intimacy is all about mutual trust, personable vulnerability, and (literally) naked honesty.

“50 Shades” distorts intimacy by promoting selfish manipulation, objectification of others (particularly women), and putting one’s own gratification over that of one’s sexual partner. Paul’s great description of love in 1 Corinthians 13 contains truths that stand in complete contrast to the selfish and shallow intimacy promoted by “50 Shades.”

Love does not dishonor others…
Love is not self-seeking…
Love does not delight in evil…
Love always protects…
Love always trusts…

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