All But Normal tells the story of my childhood through the lens of our family’s life with disability. When my mom was just fourteen years old, she suffered a traumatic brain injury in a car accident. Because of that injury, she could never drive a car, hold a job, or move with ease. She lived with significant physical, emotional, and mental health challenges for the rest of her life.

She also loved Jesus.

To this day, my mom remains one of my greatest spiritual heroes.

Our home was often filled with chaos. The effects of her disability touched nearly every day of our family life. As a little boy, there were moments that were confusing, frightening, and heartbreaking. Yet those were also the moments when I discovered that God meets us in the darkest places. He became my refuge long before I knew how to explain theology. He simply met me in my need.

One of the greatest surprises over these past ten years has been hearing from readers. Countless people with complicated, painful, and deeply challenging childhoods have written to tell me that God used All But Normal to help them revisit some of their hardest memories, not with despair, but with hope. Nothing could be more meaningful to me than knowing God has used my family’s story to bring healing and encouragement to others.

One of the beautiful threads woven throughout the book is the story of Joni Eareckson Tada. I mention Joni more than a dozen times, and I was deeply honored that she wrote the Foreword.

Long before I ever knew Joni personally, her life had already shaped mine.

Her memoir, Joni: The Unforgettable Story of a Young Woman’s Struggle Against Quadriplegia and Depression, published in 1976, became a lifeline for my mom. After one of the emotional breakdowns that so often accompanied her brain injury, she would eventually gather herself and quietly say, “If God can help Joni, He can help me. If Joni can do it, so can I.”

In our home, the two names most associated with hope were Jesus… and Joni.

That is why serving today as President of Joni and Friends feels almost impossible to describe. It feels as though God has brought my story full circle. What I watched my own family navigate as a child is now the very ministry in which God has called me to serve. Every day I have the privilege of coming alongside families who are living what many would call an “all but normal” life because disability has become part of their story too.

The same Jesus who sustained my mom. The same Jesus who has sustained Joni for decades. The same Jesus who met a frightened little boy in the middle of family chaos is still meeting people today. His peace is real. His joy is available to everyone who trusts Him as Savior and then walks closely with Him, trusting His sovereign hand through suffering. As the Apostle Paul reminds us, “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).

My mom has now been with Jesus for more than twenty-five years. Recently, I told Joni that if she arrives in heaven before me, I have one favor to ask. Would she find my mom and tell her that, later in life, we had the privilege of serving the Lord together?

Without missing a beat, Joni smiled and said, “I’ll run.”

I can still picture that conversation.

For ten years, God has used All But Normal, my mother’s battle with physical, emotional, and mental health challenges, and her testimony of hope in Christ to minister to countless people.

Amazing.

Only God.

Two hundred fifty years. Today, as fireworks stands pop up on street corners and flags line neighborhood streets, our nation marks a milestone few countries ever reach. It’s worth pausing to reflect.

I love this country. I suspect you do too. Yet if you’re anything like me, the Fourth of July stirs something deeper than simple celebration. There is a healthy tension in the heart of a Christian who loves their nation, a tension I don’t think we should rush to resolve.

The Gift We Celebrate

On the one hand, we feel a healthy pride. Not arrogance, but the good kind of gratitude that arises when you consider what America has stood for: liberty, the dignity of every person, freedom to worship, freedom to speak, and the remarkable idea that people can govern themselves. These are not small things. Much of the world has never experienced them. Celebrating them is right and good.

But pride, left unchecked, can become something far less beautiful. That’s why we also need humility. Everything we enjoy came at a cost most of us did not pay. Someone fought for the freedom I exercise so casually. Someone’s mother received a folded flag at a graveside. The liberty I often take for granted was purchased by men and women who gave their strength, their sacrifice, and sometimes their very lives.

Holding Pride and Humility Together

Consider the guitar-string harmony I picture. Pride and humility are not enemies. Play only the string of pride, and patriotism becomes arrogance, a nation admiring itself in the mirror, perhaps even an edge of disdain for those in other nations because they are not Americans. Play only humility, and we forget to give thanks, treating our freedoms as the result of random historical accidents rather than gifts. But strum both strings together, and you hear something harmonious and beautiful, grateful confidence and humble celebration, all in one incredible sound.

Scripture holds these together as well. “Righteousness exalts a nation” (Proverbs 14:34). There is a place for national aspiration and honor. Yet the same Bible reminds us, “What do you have that you did not receive?” (1 Corinthians 4:7). Everything good is a gift, a gift from God.

The Giver Behind the Gift

Behind every soldier’s sacrifice, every founder’s vision, and 250 years of imperfect progress stands a gracious God who has poured out His kindness on this nation. America is not God’s chosen nation in the way Israel was in the Bible. Yet we have certainly been a greatly blessed nation. And blessing should always produce humility and gratitude, never entitlement. We can love our nation, but let’s love its Giver more.

Celebrate Well

So today, wave the flag. Grill the burgers. Watch the fireworks with your family. Feel a healthy pride in this country. That’s appropriate.

But somewhere in the celebration, bow your head. Thank God for those who gave everything. Thank Him for His undeserved grace, poured out on our nation and on each of us.

Proud and humble. That’s the heart of healthy patriotism. Followers of Jesus can celebrate a nation, loving it dearly while loving its Giver even more.

Happy 250th Birthday, America!

The Leadership Challenge Beneath the Surface

Leadership tends to bring issues to light. Some are clear and easy to understand.

Others seem complex, layered, and persistent. Over time, one of the most valuable skills a leader can develop is knowing the difference between a problem to fix and a tension to manage.

At first glance, those two things may appear very similar. They both create pressure. They both demand attention. They both invite discussion and action. However, they are not the same. When leaders confuse the two, organizations can waste a lot of energy trying to open doors that were never meant to be opened.

Some issues are genuinely problems. They have a cause, a solution, and once tackled, they can be resolved. Think of a broken process, an unclear policy, a staffing gap, or a technology failure. These things can be diagnosed and fixed.

But other issues are tensions, and they never fully go away. They exist in the space between two good values or two necessary priorities, both of which must be respected. In ministry contexts like ours, tensions are always present. Innovation and stability. Speed and care. Stewardship and generosity. Global vision and local effectiveness.

You can’t “solve” those things once and for all. They must be managed wisely over time.

The Danger of Treating Every Issue the Same

Leadership author Peter Drucker observed, “Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.” Part of doing the right things is understanding which issues demand decisive solutions and which need ongoing discernment.

When leaders treat every issue as a problem, they often look for permanent solutions to inherently dynamic situations. They create policies to fix what truly needs wisdom. They develop systems to address what actually requires ongoing prayer, conversation, and discernment.

On the other hand, when leaders see every problem as a source of tension, they often avoid addressing issues that truly need solutions. Clear problems stay unresolved. Decisions are delayed. Accountability diminishes. Things that should have been addressed directly turn into ongoing frustrations for everyone involved.

In other words, wisdom involves having the humility to ask a simple yet powerful question: Is this a problem to solve or a tension to manage?

Scripture reminds us that discernment is given by God to those who request it. In James 1:5, we read: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”

Leadership decisions are rarely made in a vacuum. They require prayer, perspective, and a willingness to listen to the Lord and to others.

Leaders Must Discern the Difference

So, how do we start to tell the difference? How do we know if something is a problem to solve or a tension to manage?

First, ask whether the issue can actually be resolved.

If there is a clear root cause and a clear corrective action, you are probably dealing with a problem. A broken system can be fixed. A confusing policy can be made clearer. A role that lacks clarity can be defined.

Second, consider whether both sides of the issue reflect important values.

Tensions often arise between two good things that both matter. For instance, we want to grow the ministry while also protecting our culture. We want to steward resources wisely while also boldly stepping forward in faith. When two important values pull against each other, the goal is rarely to eliminate one. It’s to embrace both.

Third, check if the issue keeps coming back over time.

Problems tend to fade once they are solved. Tensions keep reappearing, requiring ongoing adjustments. Just like steering a ship, leadership often involves making small, continuous corrections to keep the ministry on course.

Fourth, seek counsel from others who offer diverse perspectives.

One of the gifts of the Body of Christ is shared wisdom. Proverbs reminds us that discernment increases when we listen carefully. “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed” (Proverbs 15:22).

Healthy leadership teams foster space for these conversations. Together we pray, listen, and ask God to help us see clearly.

Leading with Wisdom and Faithfulness

One idea shared with me when I first became a leader was this: “The mark of a mature organization is not that tensions disappear, but that leaders learn to hold them faithfully.”

That is especially true in ministry. We are stewards of a calling that is both spiritual and practical. We care deeply about people while also managing resources. We move forward with a vision to reach this generation while remaining grounded in biblical conviction.

Some issues will need bold decisions and clear solutions. Others will require patience, humility, and steady leadership over time.

Both approaches to leadership matter.

And both require wisdom from the Lord.

At Joni and Friends, we are blessed with a mission that calls us to communicate the Gospel and mobilize the global church to serve people living with disability. That mission puts us at the center of many important leadership tensions. Local ministry and global movement. Innovation and stewardship. Compassion and clarity.

Our goal is not to eliminate those tensions, but to faithfully steward them for the glory of God and the good of others.

So when new challenges surface, it helps to pause and ask a quiet question before rushing to act: Is this a problem to solve, or a tension to manage?

That simple moment of discernment can save an organization a great deal of time, energy, and frustration. More importantly, it helps us lead with wisdom, humility, and dependence on the Lord.

May God give each of us the discernment we need as we serve Christ together, and may He continue to guide this ministry as we aim to help the global church learn to live, love, and lead like Jesus as they serve those living with disability.

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